About this book:
The people we love are thieves.
They steal our hearts. They steal our breath.
They steal our sanity.
And we let them.
Over and over and over again.
They say you never forget your first time.
Mine was with a homeless musician who effed my brains out under a bridge.
He was my first love. And fourteen years later, I still can’t get him out of my head.
He broke all my rules.
He also broke my heart.
I watched him climb to stardom, cheering him on from afar.
But I was never a fan; just a girl in love.
Like a tornado, he spiraled, leaving a path of destruction in his wake.
But love conquers all, right? It has to. Because here I stand, ravaged and ruined, needing it to be true.
You can’t go back, but I want to. Back to the bridge. Back to when he sang only for me. Before he was famous. Before he shattered my heart.
I thought I knew everything about him.
But I could not have been more wrong.
He promised me every tomorrow. And here I am, waiting.
Release Date: 13th September, 2018.
What I think?
NOTE: This is a critical review, so it contains spoilers… duh.
Okay then, moment of honesty- I am a tad bit disappointed with this book.
No shit, this was literally my most anticipated book of the year, simply because of that blurb and the fact that every single book that I’ve read by Cole has been a 4.5/5 star read, and I just knew that this was going to be angsty as all fuck, and then Cole just kept pushing the release dates farther and farther away (which I should mention right now is not a criticism, because seriously it just made me pant even more for the book). And then I think I might have spontaneously combusted when this baby finally hit my kindle, but who’s keeping a track am I right?
Alright, before we begin, I just wanna let you know that I might be a bit rusty now, what with no reviews in such a long ass time, but let me give this a go.
What I loved about this book?
Cole’s writing has to be the biggest hit for me. She has this poetic quality to her, such that it doesn’t quite matter what exactly you’re reading, but you are entirely engaged in it. Okay, let me rephrase it, the writing felt like this old silk scarf you’ve scavenged out of your great grand-ma’s things, carrying this immutable scent of melancholy and longing with it. Absolutely impossible to ignore, and wholly unputdownable.
But other than that, I don’t really think there’s much to this story. Which leads us to our next part.
What I did not like in this book?
This was me going into and after I finished this book—
I think Pooh shows it perfectly, the main issue in this case doesn’t seem to be the book and neither the story and definitely not Cole’s writing. It solely seems like I am the one to blame.
How you ask?
Well, I think my expectations were simply too great with this book, and for this maybe you can blame me, but maybe you just can’t- Carian has a way of weaving all these stories that make you beg for more- and with the number of times she put off the release, it just heightened the anticipation, so much so that by the time I finally got to it, I was way too amped-up, and the story just failed to stimulate all those crazy hormones doing mambo in my bloodstream.
But, for the sake of being a bitch, let me still break things down that annoyed me, earning a reduced star.
One of the biggest issues I had with this book was that I simply couldn’t connect with the characters. Piper and Blue/Evan had an unconventional relationship that literally escalated to unhealthy levels real quick, and I was stuck rubbing my neck at the speed of said escalation.
Now then, Evan also known as Blue, is a homeless musician Piper meets one fine day during her work lunch hour. Naturally he’s an incredibly good looking guy (because of course he is), and Piper feels this connection to him (because of course she does), and all that static electricity in the air literally fries her brains and she ends up losing her virginity him one not so fine evening, under the bridge where he sleeps. And then he leaves her pregnant and with his dog, and becomes a rockstar and never bothers to contact her until she literally falls into his bed and thus ensues a 14 year long fuck-fest. Literally.
SCAN-DAL-OUUUUS. My mother would be holding her pearls if she ever heard of this, and also if she wore pearls is all I’m saying.
I’m not really putting this very nicely, am I? *sighs*
Okay okay okay, one last cohesive attempt at telling you my issues with this book- which mainly were the characters.
- I know love is blind and all, but come on lady! That guy left you pregnant and with his bloody dog, and the first thing you do is not slap him, but fall in his bed? UGH.
- Another big problem I had with her was how blind she really was to Evan’s issues. I, as a reader could see it, her (I think 12/13 year old) daughter could see it, his best friend could see it, and she, being the closest thing to him couldn’t? I mean, there were moments when it felt like she was deliberately ignoring all those issues he seemed to be portraying. And those moment, sadly, were one too many for me to feel comfortable with.
- Her dedication to Blue seems very misguided honestly. She’s like that ex-girlfriend that a guy just can’t get rid of. I mean seriously babe, he’s a rich rockstar, if he wants to contact ya, he will. I’m not calling her illogical, but I am calling her illogical- when she is surrounded by Blue.
- Left Piper like a jackass without any reason to do so.
- Plays with her feeling through the entirety of the book, and rarely ever feels remorse for it. Now don’t tell me he has mental issues. I know he does. But more than half the things he does is incredibly abusive in nature- I’m talking the manipulative kind of abuse. I did not feel very keen about their relationship to be fairly honest with you.
- Okay, this is probably the second biggest reason I absolutely disliked Blue, but when he is told of his daughter Lyric, his first response isn’t really parental, but how he can use her to get close to Piper (see the manipulation?). I mean yeah sure, people do that, but I don’t really expect to see something like this in my male protagonist; I’m supposed to love this guy, not despise him.
- And the last reason I absolutely did not like him- he left his dog with a potential stranger. I repeat- HE LEFT HIS DOG, THE SAME DOG THAT WAVED AT EVERYONE WHO TIPPED HIM, WITH A POTENTIAL STRANGER. None but a true monster could do that. Or at least a highly unlikable person. The difference is minuscule.
- And this one last thing I wanted to just add is, is it just me (if you have read the book then tell me down in the comments), or did Cole just attempt to excuse all of Evan’s behaviour on his mental health issues?
So there you go I guess. You see why I did not like this book much? It’s not even like I’m trying to deliberately be a bitch, but sometimes I just cannot help myself. Cole attempted at writing a brave book, I won’t disagree, but it is something that did not work for me.
Thing is, with the kind of book slump I’m having, I desperately wanted to love this book- I really did, trust me- and I just couldn’t.
I finished this book, and I was like meh, this could have been so much better, so much so that now the time I spent craving this book feels entirely wasted.
Is that harsh? Totally, I’m not even going to deny it. But thing is, I was promised angst (okay maybe not officially, but we all knew angst was a part of it, just from the bloody blurb), and all throughout the story all I could see were a string of bad decisions and character weaknesses, that did not necessarily have to be there. I know someone might tell me that this was a hyper-realistic book, and that reality is disappointing, but to that person I want to say, dude, chick straight up waited for the guy for fourteen fucking years, without ever attempting to move on; she literally just forgave him almost instantaneously for leaving her pregnant with his kid, and his dog. We’ve left behind hyper-realism long ago.
I don’t know, there are a few things very good about this book, but at the same time, most of it is too full of itself. This was a book that boasted an epic love-story, and all I got was a tale of misguided feelings and some really mentally fucked up characters I just couldn’t bring myself to root for because a kid was involved in the cross-fire.
About this author:
I have a passion for the bad boys, those covered in tattoos, sexy smirks, ripped jeans, fast cars, motorcycles and of course, the sweet girls that try to tame them and win their hearts.
My first novel in the best-selling Ashes & Embers series, Storm, published in September of 2014. I have many books and sequels slated for this series. My new spin-off series, Devils Wolves, launched in 2016 with the best-selling novel, Torn. There are several books planned for this series as well.
Born and raised a Jersey girl, I now reside in beautiful New Hampshire with my husband and our multitude of furry pets and spend most of my time writing, reading, and vacuuming.